How self absorbed are our prayers?

In my many years as pastor of the greatest congregation on the planet, one of the most consistent elements I noticed is how self-absorbed prayers can be. "Oh Lord, help me out of this mess...; heal my back...; touch my spouse, work a miracle for XYZ..." There is hardly a category under which most of our prayers fall that don't have some self-ish motivation grounded in my well being, my comfort, my joy, my peace, my happiness...  As a pastor, my first epiphany in this arena of prayer came in the manner in which I used to pray for healing.  Healing seems to be our default position for every ailment either for benefit of myself, the one I am praying for, or both.  So I started asking myself--WHY are you praying THAT? Eureka! It changed the way I pray.

What's interesting is that we find plenty of examples in the Scriptures that are just as self-absorbed.  Many of the Psalms are cries of desperation from hurting, troubled, worried, scared or ailing individuals. But others, at first blush anyway, have a different quality, a different focus to them even if they seem to be pretty much like all the others--ME centered.  But are they?

John the Baptist was man on a  mission dressing down the wretchedness of his day and boldly stood before King Herod and called him out for his blatant immorality and wickedness. John’s “reward” is Herod's barred hotel. His "prayer" to his friends was to go back to Jesus and ask Him one question. It's interesting John doesn't ask for Jesus to come and deliver him out of the injustice upon him. He only wanted reassurance the ultimate sacrifice was worth it. “Are you the ONE?" 

The apostle Paul lived a life of sequential heart aches, physical pain, deprivations...He prayed a lot for others but he also asked others to pray for him and for his dire situations in which he found himself. But look at the key difference of his prayers' purposes.

"Now I urge you, brethren, by our Lord Jesus Christ and by the love of the Spirit, to strive together with me in your prayers to God for me…” Sounds like what we might pray right? But Paul continues.  “…[so] that I may be rescued from those who are disobedient in Judea [for the purpose] “…that my service for Jerusalem may prove acceptable to the saints; so that I may come to you in joy by the will of God and find refreshing rest in your company."  (Romans 15:30-32) 

Paul wasn’t asking for relief for personal gratification but that he may complete the work to which the Lord had assigned him. Paul was repeatedly jailed for preaching Jesus and his express desire is to be freed in order to fulfill the mission of Christ.

Many times over 35 years in ministry I have been asked to pray for people who are in some way distressed, troubled or ill. Many of these times found me standing next to a hospital bed having been asked specifically to pray for healing. Sometimes I would--boldly, and categorically. But other times I wouldn’t necessarily yet no matter the situation, including prayers for myself during times of grave illness, my prayers were centered on restoring the one [or myself] for God's purposes; “Thy Kingdom Come…” After all it is why everyone of us have been put here in the first place. We have been bought with a price and our lives are simply NOT our lives.